Halloween Fun

Shouldn't everyone be afraid of something like this?  See, it doesn't seem quite so weird at Halloween, but try this at Easter, and you're a true psycho

There's so many fun things to do with the kiddies on Halloween that would land you in jail any other time of the year.  Oh yeah, just try luring small children to your house with brightly lit decorations and promises of candy any other time of year.  Anyway, you can dress up in inappropriate costumes, tell them scary stories, make humorous drunkin, pukin pump-ko-lantern (cause nuttin is funnier than a  pukin punkin), or teach them generally unsafe behaviors like the old coot using the punkin for a boat.

This should scare the neighbors

So here's something fun to do with the little dears.  Halloween. A great time to do so many inappropriate things. 

This old coot is inflicting revenge on his children by showing how this is done to his grandchildren.  Wish I had a big punkin to use as a bad example.

This one is nice, because it teaches kids the cause and effect relationship.

Home Safety

Ok, you want your house to be safe when you return home from one of my recommended field trips with the kiddies.  Here's an idea you can use.  Have the little dears lay down on the porch or sidewalk.  Find some chalk.....you probably let them use it in the back yard last time you barbequed so you could drink a cold frosty barley pop in peace.....outline the bodies of the precious ones.  Put up some crime scene tape....For improved performance, add some splattered ketchup.  Leave some empty 9mm casings and put those little evidence numbers around.  Nobody should bother the house (unless they're really psycho, and then they were probably gonna do crazy stuff anyway).  For extra fun, pick a TV  or movie character the kids really like.  Before the kids come to visit use your creative talents to make a chalk outline.  You can add the crime scene, ketchup, and spent shell casings if you want.  Make it recognizable.  Wait for the surprised look on thier faces.  Sponge Bob and that purple dinosaur would be funny to me, or the guy from Yo Gabba Gabba.  I wouldn't feel bad about letting them fret about any of them.  Hey, don't judge so harshly.....you did lie to them about Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny didn't you?